say cheeseeeee....

mr calculator was in town and i am officially became his PA/interpreter/tourist guide/info-desk/dining partner/anyam ketupat partner/clown /entertainer etc..

easy?not really.because..
especially if you have to take care of someone who is keep going chanting .."Oh!This country HOT..oh HOT...atsuiii...what type of weather is this..uh..HOT...panas...blablabla..".
Nak jer aku cakap "..hello,neraka lagi panassss OK.."

so,as he don't like the HOT weather,he prefered to roam the city,shopping mall.And,why Mr Calculator ??..yes,that is because,every single thing..i repeat..EVERY single thing he would like to browse(browse ok,not even buy),he will punch his small calculator ,comparing the price dollar to yen or whatever lah.pokok pangkal,calculator mesti tekan punya.a-z-a-b.
and he keep chanting .." mahalnya...murahnya...mahal sangat...murah sangat,tak logic katanya".
beli nya idak lah pulak.a-z-a-b lah.
haku nya kaki dah penat,and i know i have to do a lot of walking, i purposely put on my snickers.
he ask me "majide undo kutsu de dekakeru desuka?(read:wah,seriously??ko keluar rumah dengan kasut bersenam?).

satu lagi hobby dia,selain masuk keluar kedai,ialah,menawar!!!dia ajak aku pergi Lucky Plaza,kat sana kan boleh tawar2x harga.lepas berjaya tawar,dia akan say bye bye jerlah kat auntie kedai.aku rasa,a few of the auntie tuh pon dok sumpah aku gaklah kan.dia kata,satu kepuasan dapat membeli barang paada harga yang dia nak.hmm..ko bukak lah kedai ko sendrik kan.

ini.ini olang,ada porche dan bmw ok.voleh??..azab lah.kalau aku jadi dia,pejam mata campak jerlah duit kan bayor yer dak?

so alkisahnya,tengah dia menekan-nekan calculator,masa tuh kami di kedai Tag Heuer,he almost made me buy one of the watch there ok.gulp..terbalik gituhkan..patut aku soh dia membeli yerdak?.around 6000 dollar.gulp.dia boleh,beli jam tuh cam beli bawang jer kan...dan,oleh kerana we are the first customer,of course lah kan..mengikut kepercayaan orang cina,if 1st customer for the day,keluar kedai tanpa beli apa-apa..harusssssslah suweyyyy lah kedai dia satu hari kan?..haruslah gigih salesman tuh kan membuang ayaq liur dia....make it shortlah kan...,aku selamba jer keluarrr dari kedai tuh,sambil mr calculator dok ceramah,"that is cheap bla bla bla..if you wear that,definetely dekiru hito ni mieru yo!!.",sambil dia tekan calculator nya of course.(maksudnya: minah!!..kalo ko pakai jam ni..sure meletopss!!) DAN..DAN.....di kala itu lah...di kala itulah......
ok,make it short,if korang dok tengok chanel travel and living,and nampak adegan sorang mamat tinggi galah dok tekan2 calculator ,dan sorang budak cute dok gantung camera dia kat leher..pakai baju pink..haaaaa...aku lah tuh.. ada penggambaran rupa-rupanya...!!!!!!! glamer kejap.hik.

anyhoooo...i managed to make him shop.
and he is a fan of chinese tea,we visited this chinese tea outlet,(selling chinese tea only)beria ni ajak aku cari kedai tuh,ingt nak borong selori yer dak..sebungkus jer u ols!!!fengsan.

oh yeah...no moreeeee night safari pleaseeeeeeeeeeee...ini dah my 5th time.i think if i go one more time,i will turn into lion and might as well i reside there.2 scoop of ben&jerry compensate my tiredness.impress betol dia dengan safari ni,errrrr...nothing ler sebenornya.yerlah,born in london,raise in TK,jetting round the world..tak pernah nengok binatang kot gamaknya??????
i visited safari in japan when i was student,that was farrrrr farrr rmoreeee impressive.

haaaaaaaa...berlaku peristiwa ala-ala drama,lepas makan kat jumbo seafood(yummy!sebab free,laagi le sedap yer dak.hik.)..masa nak naik boat di clark quay.
masa beli tiket,sebab kami ni 2 orang jer..counter girl asked us join the tour trip yang tengah beratur.they are all japanese,and as it perfect for mr calculator,i agree to join them.furthermore,we have to pick up luggage at the Conrad Hotel,before dashing to airport,so lagi cepat lagi bagus.
Masa kami dua nak naik boat,kami kena tahan,setelah di kenal pasti..bukan ahli rombongan itu.of course lah muka aku bukan muka jepon.aku cakap,budak counter kata boleh,dia yang suruh join group ni...dia kata..lu duduk tepi kejap!!cheh.

mr calculator diam jer dok atas tangga deck tuh.tiba2x..bot tuh jalan jer u ols..tinggalkan kami dua.aku pon apa lagi..jerit lahhhh... "hellooo!!..uncleee!!...hellooooooo....kami belom naik!!"
so,orang2x dari counter ticket dok jerit2x boat tuh balik ke deck semula amik kami.sampai carut2x lah pulak!!!!yerr...dia balik semula..tapiiiiiiiiiiii,dek kerana geram kena carut dek orang counter, dia turun dari boat..dan berlaku adegan tumbuk menumbuk!!!terjang menerajang!!!...
so....SEMUA pelancong,dalam boat..atas boat...luar boat..termasuk ler aku..ketakutannnn!!!!!!!!

takut gila lah u uols!!!!....

setelah di leraikan,kami naik boat,dan perjalanan di teruskan,of course lah mr calculator ketawakan aku yang over-react ketakutannss!!!!

now,what left is acheing feet and fat fat fat..


eating-too-much!

note:aku kan...pernah le berangan to quit my boring job,and become a tourist guide gittew.tapi -kan-..lepas peristiwa ini,macam rasa taubat nasohaaa lah pulak.
kalau kesabaran tahap nipis kulit bawang,aku takut,pelancong aku ke mana,aku kemana lah plak...yer dok.